I've posted here about my numbers, stats, pics, and so forth. But there's so much more to this project then fitting into my skinny jeans (Okay, that's a big part of it, but still).I bought a lava lamp last night. It was on sale. It's pink and purple. I don't care if I'm a 37-year-old woman. I needed a lava lamp. I'm sitting here watching the blobs slowly float up then slowly drop back down into a misshapen puddle. That's what I feel like most of the time. Not the going up part, the coming down part.
I don't sleep at night, then I don't want to wake up in the mornings. My feet hurt all the time, I think because of all the extra weight on them. My neck and shoulders hurt all the time, despite massages, stretching, vibrating and heating gizmos, creams designed to bring circulation, blah blah blah. My chest is too heavy, and it pulls on my neck. That's just all there is to it. I have freakin' dents in my shoulders from my bra straps.
My stomach hurts a lot, and I don't know what that's all about. My skin is breaking out like I was 15 again (If only I had the figure to match!). It is nearly impossible for me to lug the boxes of books and supplies that I have to for my work, because I'm just not strong enough. God forbid stairs become involved.
I used to walk about 3 miles a day easily. I even ran a 5K once. ONCE. When I started my walking up again a few weeks ago, I got winded doing 20 minutes at a slow pace.
ENOUGH! Enough of this nonsense! I'm not 80. I don't have an incurable disease. I just eat too much and don't move enough. This is ridiculous.
I'm going to yoga class tomorrow. I haven't done yoga in months. It's not entirely my fault. My instructor (who is AWESOME) had a baby and took some time off. Now, I know, I have six yoga DVDs at home, and I'm perfectly capable of doing yoga without her. But the truth is, I didn't want to. I hadn't been going regularly for months before she had her baby. It was almost a relief when she stopped teaching, because I didn't feel so guilty for missing class.
But she's back tomorrow. And I'm going. And I know I'll feel a lot better afterward. Here's to feeling like the bubbles going UP!
4 comments:
Ugh, I can totally sympathize. I wish my kick boxing instructor would take maternity leave for 6 months... That's the last thing I need really. I hope you're right, about enjoying exercise. I think that maybe, I need to try something else. When I was just walking and running at the track with my dog, I enjoyed it. It was peaceful. I pushed myself there, because I know I have to... plus it doesn't cost me $5 each time I do it... Anyway, Janet, keep up the hard work. I know what you mean about the bra straps, neck hurting, etc. etc. Maybe biking and some hot baths is the cure?
I've been so lazy about going to the gym. And on the days I do go, I allow myself to just eat whatever I want because, hey! I went to the gym today!
But it shouldn't be like that. I need to get my eating under control.
I have a friend that goes to the gym with me. I told her to make me feel guilty when I don't go, but she refuses. She just says, "I'm just there, waiting for you." Which I guess does make me feel guilty, but not guilty enough since I keep skipping on her since she's just so nice about it.
Someone wanna guilt me into getting my butt to the gym??
yes! We are WAY TOO MUCH FUN to be the "down" bubbles! Up, Up and Away! Where skinny jeans and ice cream happily co-exist! I'll meet you there!
Love that lava lamp and the analogy. I hopt your bubbles keep going up!
Also, I just found your blog. I love the idea of a group blog with all of you trying to lose weight. That's so cool that you can support each other!
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