All I Really Needed to Know about Health, I Learned From Dr. Oz

What a genius this man is – and really, why can't other Doctors talk to you like this and make sense like this? But I will say, there is a curse to knowing what Dr. Oz teaches.

For example, have you read a bread label lately? According to what I understand – foods that include enriched flour – of any color or high fructose corn syrup are to be considered “junk”. I challenge you to go to your local bread aisle and look at the labels and count how many – by this definition – are worthy to go into your body. Want to know how many there are at my usual stomping ground? Like 3! And they frequently change labels and products – so it's a HUGE ordeal to find an acceptable bread on EVERY trip.

Almost as irritating – is shopping for yogurt. It should not be this hard to shop. It should not be this hard to find a quality product – want to know how many brands offer yogurt without high fructose corn syrup (I don't care what the commercials say – Dr. Oz said Don't Do It!)? 3 brands. But on one of the brands – you can only buy certain flavors – so it's not like you can just give any yogurt label blanket approval, which makes it an even more taxing chore to choose your options.

And here is something that makes me stone-crazy mad. Half of your “trans-fat free” foods, likely have trans-fats in them. It's just an amount that the FDA considers “insignificant”. Which I think is a load of crap! I mean, if you have to list that a STICK OF GUM has 3 CALORIES!!!!!!! (And that won't KILL ME) How can you possibly accept that there are trace amounts of Trans Fats in my food? How can you think it is OK for me to perhaps eat items all day that are labeled as Trans Fat Free – and that a person could reasonably be consuming more than the “recommended” amount of Trans Fats – without realizing they were ingesting ANY? Mr. FDA, I am here to tell you – it is NOT acceptable. To demonstrate this fact I hope that someone, someday puts “insignificant amounts of poison ivy in your underwear” and let's see if it makes an impact in YOUR health and well-being, maybe then you can understand how passionately I believe you are currently supporting a lie. Shame on You, Mr. FDA!

But let us re-focus on the truth-teller, Dr. Oz.

Dr. Oz, if you are listening – thank you for sharing your knowledge. Thank you for letting me know of the many poisons that I am feeding my family and myself. Thank you for showing me the error of my ways. I'll be sending you my bill for Tylenol – my use has increased tenfold since I learned how “fun” shopping can be with you! It's a gift and a curse – all at the same time.

So for those who care to learn from my lessons learned – I now make a special trip to go to the Bread Store. They carry Pumpernickel bread at ½ the price of the regular store – it has NOTHING evil in it and is more pleasing to my entire family than any “wheat” variety that I have located. They also carry several of the “Natural” labels- but still read the labels. It is a pain to shop a specialty store (and a huge temptation to stock up on Zingers and Ho-Ho's) but when I go – I go BIG and I find it freezes quite well. For some reason, we are happier with the defrosting if you turn the loaf upside down on the counter – superstition? I don't know; it works for us. And when it comes to yogurt, I stick with the large container organic varieties in plain or vanilla, low fat. You can add fresh fruit and a granola bar for a kick-butt breakfast. Or you can eat it plain and add some dry cereal for a little variety (I'm fond of regular Cheerios or Rice Krispies). If you are desperate for a chocolate variety – you can also add a little sugar free chocolate milk powder.

Enjoy the tips and if you hear someone screaming in the bread aisle – it could be me, or someone else that is plagued with the knowledge! Anyone else trying to follow the Dr.Oz suggestions and finding it hard?