Elizabeth's Back!

My Turn! Well many of you... well, some of you... well, maybe one or two of you, may be wondering why I haven’t posted since January of 2010. Yeah, I know unbelievable and inexcusable. To put it in summer concert terms, life in 2010 was pretty much a Crap Fest. Yes, I said Crap Fest 2010, with a capitol C and a big ‘ol fest! This has a great deal to do with why I didn’t post or have anything weight wise to post about. My exercise and eating habits went completely out the door. I can proudly announce that I didn’t gain any weight but I certainly didn’t lose any either. I pretty much stayed where I was. (Considering the 5 deaths of friends and family, my dog getting brain cancer and dying on Christmas Eve, my job being cut and several friends losing their jobs as well.) I think no change in weight was a great accomplishment. Although when I look in the mirror I can see the stress and strain of the past year, which is why I’ve rededicated myself to a new regime of eating healthier and exercise.

One of my big food loves is bread or really any starchy food. For the past week I’ve cut out eating any starchy foods during the day (Breakfast and lunch) eating mostly veggies and fruit. For dinner I eat a normal meal with my beloved starchy foods on the menu. As far as my exercise routine… well my intentions were good but my body did not comply. I fell last Thursday and fractured my pinky and scraped up my knee really bad. So riding my bike, which is my favorite form of exercise, has been left in the garage. I know I could probably walk but motivation has left the building without me.

I’m really hoping that getting back into blogging again (with two fingers and a thumb on my left hand) will keep me honest with myself and do the things I’ve been neglecting to do for the past year and a half. My God! It’s really been a year and a half! Kick me in the ass if I haven’t blogged again in 3 weeks. Seriously!

How Can I Keep My Job from Making Me Fat?

I've been pondering today why healthy living is so much easier for me on weekends/vacations.  Seriously, I've been off work for three glorious days, and I've happily eaten normal portions of healthy foods (okay, a small amount of cake, but I swear, normal portions of cake, and only once per day).  I've also managed to do some form of exercise each day.  Maybe not a full on workout, but I push mowed the yard, went for a long walk, and did some yoga.

Do you think I'll be able to keep it up once tomorrow comes around?  I hope so, but I'm not holding my breath.

And this is my list of excuses reasons:
1.  Lack of sleep makes people fat.  It's been proven.  And I'm so not a morning person.  Work day means alarm clock day, and that means I didn't get enough sleep.
2.  Stress.  Work is stressful.  I eat more, and make less healthy food choices, when stressed.
3.  I travel a lot for work.  And I realized today, not only does this mean that I end up grabbing something at the quick store or a fast food option, but it also means I eat more in the morning, because I'm trying to keep myself from being hungry later.
4.  Working all day means I usually don't have time or energy for exercise.
5.  Stress.  I know I said that already, but I think it bears repeating.

So, what am I going to do about it?

1.  I don't know about the sleep thing.  I just don't do well when I have to get up early.  Left completely on my own, I'd go to bed about 1:00 a.m. and sleep until about 10:00 every morning.  My work schedule can be somewhat flexible sometimes, but I don't think an 11:00 to 7:00 schedule all the time would make my boss or my boyfriend very happy with me.  But maybe I could get away with it sometimes?

2.  I'm still pondering whether the amount of stress my job causes me means I need a new job.  Or whether I just don't do well working.  Or whether everyone's job is stressful, and that's just life?  But I suppose I can take some steps to lessen my stress.  Stop and take deep breaths more often.  Get up from the computer for a few minutes every hour.  Try not to expect people to be sane?

3.  On the eating on the road thing...I guess I should probably stop eating more in anticipation of maybe being hungry later.  That's kind of silly.  Plus, I could pack a little cooler with healthier snack and meal alternatives.

4.  Once upon a time I had a plan of doing little five minute bursts of exercise during my work day.  A few push ups here, dancing wildly to the radio there.  In my defense, my work duties changed so that I'm very rarely actually in my home office anymore.  But I'm hopeful that things will calm down soon, and then I can start this up again.  And I do get a 30 minute lunch break.  Now that the weather is nice, I could take a short walk during that time and still eat a sandwich.

5.  It just all comes back to the stress for me.  And I'm not doing so well handling it.  But hopefully it will get better.

What do you do to minimize the stress in your job?

It's On My List

Dear Readers,

I have been away for a long time. You were on my mind more than I can begin to express. You should know that the guilt of my silence has weighed heavy on my scale- and my mind.

I wish I could tell you that I was off solving the worlds problems. Or was so busy shedding pounds that I couldn't sit long enough to type. Or that I found a way to sleep the pounds away. Or that I discovered a way to make TV viewing a cardio event..... Alas, I did not. I was not.

I stepped on the scale this morning for the first time in a long time. And I quickly remembered why I have a love / hate relationship with the scale. He says ugly things...and that is no way to start the day.

But if you are still out there. And you are still on this journey, I wanted you to know that I am too. So with this message - I can cross this (Must Let Bloggers Know I Have Not Yet Become A Super Model Skinny Bitch) off my list. Let's get back to business, mmm'k?

Like Stuffing Ice Cream in a Baby

The other day I witnessed something pretty disturbing.  I was in the presence of a fussy toddler, and her mother kept shoving food at her every time she'd cry.  And junk food at that, ice cream, cookies, chips.

Now, I know it's frustrating when babies won't stop crying.  And I know it's hard to be a mother.  But I also know that our relationships with food are formed very early in life.  And what this child was learning was, "When I'm upset, I'm supposed to eat junk food."

And it wasn't even really working.  She'd eat the food, then she'd scream more.  And then it got to where she would turn away from the food.  But her mother kept trying to give it to her.

Cry.

Eat junk food.

Repeat.

Feel bad anyway.

Get fat.

Feel worse.

It's interesting to me that when R and I are responsible for feeding his daughter, I make an effort to feed her healthy foods.  I make sure she has a vegetable.  We eat at the dining table like human beings.  Yet I'm responsible for feeding myself all the time, and I don't always make good choices.  And I eat dinner in front of the television every night.

It's easy to see patterns when it involves someone else.  And it's easy to know what to do to fix it.  But when it's yourself, somehow it's much harder.

Another Reason to Take Baby Steps

(I forgot to include my little daisy icon last time I posted.  Sorry!)  Several times in my long and illustrious weight loss career (stop laughing) I've had an experience where I got all gung ho and jumped in full force with a big exercise regimen.  And then I got sick and stopped.

While I know for sure that this is a real phenomena in my own body, I'd never realized there is an actual scientific reason for it.  I didn't even realize it happens to other people.  I thought it was just me and my out of shape self.

Then I read an article the other day about how doing extreme amounts of exercise does, in fact, suppress the immune system.  Thus, making one more likely to suddenly get sick.  (And in my case, give up the exercise.)

Here's an article about it.

Turns out that even athletes, who are used to vigorous exercise, often experience this immune system suppression when they drastically increase the level of intensity of their work outs.  So, I'm just saying, for lil' ol' me, who's used to sitting 16 hours a day, suddenly walking three miles five days a week is a major increase.

So, I'm taking it as another argument for making changes to one's health habits a little at a time.  And this is why I started walking again a few weeks ago, and just did a couple blocks for a few days.  Then I added another block or two every week or so.  (No, it's not because I'm lazy.  Or because I'm just that out of shape.  Well, maybe that's part of it.)

Today I did about 20 minutes all together.  Yes, that seems small, but it's a start.  And I don't want to get sick!

The Dog Who Shares My Walks

No, it's not one of my own dogs.  Usually.

See, Daisy is a puller.  And Daisy is freakishly strong.

Rudy doesn't pull much.  And if he did pull, he's pretty little, so it's not like it's a big deal to keep him under control.  He used to flop around at the end of his leash like a fish, but he got over that.

Anyway, I feel bad that I don't take them when I walk.  And I know there are things you can do to teach dogs how to walk properly.  (EG just had a puppy graduate at the top of her obedience school class, so she assures me, it can be done.)  But when I just want a nice walk, it's too stressful to take a dog who's likely to drag me through a neighbor's yard against my will.

So, I go it alone a lot of times.  And when I do that, there is a neighbor dog who often joins me.  He's a very sweet yellow lab, and when he sees me nearing his house, he runs out to greet me.  We have some petting and ear scratching time, and when he's done with that, he takes off walking, looking behind to make sure I'm following.

We'll walk on that way, and every once in a while he'll stop and ask for more ear scratches, and I'm happy to oblige.  When I turn back towards home, and we get close to his house, he'll trot off back from whence he came.  It's very neighborly.

I hadn't been walking much lately, so I hadn't seen him for a while.  But today when I went out for a stroll, there he came, running out to greet me, tail wagging.  We did our thing for a few steps, but then something happened.

Someone started yelling for him.  I didn't understand the name that was being called, but clearly, he did.  He immediately took off running for home, without so much as a wave of his paw.

I watched him racing toward the chain-link fence surrounding his back yard, and I had a moment of thinking, "Oh, dear.  He's trying so hard to be good and go home, but he's confused as to how to get inside the fence."

Wrong.

I watched this big yellow lab climb a chain link fence.  Just moseyed up to it, and paw over paw, climbed it as easily as you or I would climb a ladder.  Probably more easily.

I'm so glad my dogs don't know how to do that!

Why Did Everything Get so Hard?

I don't know what happened to me, but my whole plan of just relaxing and letting the pounds fall off isn't going great.  Somehow the relaxed philosophy that was working so well for me has turned into stress the F*&# out and watch the pounds pour back on.

Work got a little crazy.  I spent more days on the road than I'd like, and that led to being tired and pissy and eating to make myself feel better.

I did go to yoga this week, but I hadn't been in three weeks.  And it was hard.  Really hard.  And this was the "gentle yoga" class.  Ugh.

The weather is warming up though, so I'm trying to get back into walking to the end of the road and back during the day.  Maybe that will help.

I actually like cold weather and winter, but even I was getting tired of the snow and the freezing temperatures and no sunshine.  I'm hoping that spring arriving will put a "spring" back in my step.

How have you been doing?