Saturday, December 18, 2010

My Old Job Was Making Me Fat

I've posted before about how I thought my old job was making me fat.  And about how I've lost three pounds (or more?) since being laid off.  Well, I had a chance (or the misfortune, or the horrifying experience) of testing my theory once more this past week.

See, someone decided to plan a reunion Christmas party.  And I decided to go.  Against my better judgement.

It was everything I feared it would be.  It was awkward.  It was uncomfortable.  It was nerve wracking and awful.  It was tense and bitter.

Or maybe that was just me?

I don't think so.  Because most people arrived late and left early.

Anyway, the point is, it was terrible, but the food was really good.  Mostly.  And I found myself in the midst of this bizarre social/dietary experiment in which I STUFFED myself for no good reason other than being really uncomfortable and wanting to escape.  Or something.

I filled my plate once, along with everyone else.  And I ate every bite.  Then everyone else got up and got a second plate.  And I was full.  I knew I was full.  But I got up and filled my plate a second time.  And I ate every bite again.

Then I felt sick.  Then someone brought out dessert.  And it wasn't even good dessert.  But So and So had made the dessert, and I was afraid So and So would be upset if I didn't eat her dessert.  So I ate a plate.

It wasn't even good.  And I was full to the point of feeling miserable.  But I guess the physical miserableness was easier to bear than the psychological miserableness.  So I ate and ate and ate.

And I sat there thinking, "Why am I doing this?  I'm not hungry.  I'm stuffed.  But I'm going to keep eating."

I knew exactly what I was doing.  Which maybe is progress in some way.  Considering I'd worked with most of these people for years, I'm sure I did this sort of thing to myself on a regular basis.  Maybe not to that extent, but still.

The good news is, I had a Christmas party with my new co-workers later in the week, and it was great.  The food was fabulous, and I didn't stuff myself.  Yay for that!


Caren Gittleman said...

I learned a really cool thing in Weight Watcher's today to help prevent overeating at parties (but I understand that you overate at the first party for emotional reasons)

Everyone has a story...when you go to a party focus on getting three really good stories, that way you will focus on the food and not the people!

I soooo understand why you ate so much at the first party though but in the future instead of harming yourself...if you are feeling THAT uncomfortable....LEAVE! :)

Cat Chat

Brian said...

That first one sure doesn't sound like a whole lot of fun at all. You're armed with wise now!

Wyatt said...

ugh...that sounds dreadful. I've been to a few gatherings like that. I'd say skip that one next year and just go to the fun parties!! :)

Wyatt and Stanzie

Hilary said...

The first one sounds aweful... However, on the bright side, it probably will be the last one you go to. And if you get invited again,I am with Wyatt, skip it! I am always facinated how different people handle eating in uncomfortable situations. I understand both ways... However, when I am uncomfortable, I totally can't eat. Same with if I am stressed...

Brian said...

Hey, I just stopped by to tell you Happy New Year!!! It's coming, ready or not!